“Shame” – the driver which maintains sex addiction
Vital to understand the interplay between Shame and Guilt in maintaining sex addiction. Addiction and shame are inseparable. Shame and guilt are emotions causing negative self-evaluation. There is a difference between guilt and shame. Guilt says: ” This behaviour is bad”. Shame says: “I’m a bad person”.
Work on one addiction and self help techniques with inadequate rehab, counseling, sex therapy and sex facts may see other addictions re-surfacing, like gambling addiction, alcoholism & alcohol addiction, alcohol abuse, drug abuse, drug addiction, substance abuse, heroin addiction, cocaine addiction and food addiction. The need to attend SAA, a 12 steps programme, good sex facts, what is good sex, what is kinky sex, defining whether you are suffer from love & sex addiction, masturbation addiction, supersex, sex addiction recovery are just some of the features and work which you will undertake with a competent sex addiction therapist.
Listen to my radio interviews below on Sex & Love addiction.
Some compulsive and addiction behaviours include
• Magazine pornography
• Internet pornography
• Cybersex: Spending time online focused on sexual or romantic intrigue or involvement
• Compulsive masturbation
• Compulsive acting out
• Male and female escorts and/or prostitutes
• Chat rooms and social sites
• Texting sex sites
• Swinging and/or group sex
• Multiple flirtation and/or affairs
• Sex binges
What is “sex Addiction”?
Otherwise called hypersexuality, Ego-dystonic Hypersexuality, Sexual Impulse Control Disorder, Sexual Compulsivity or Paraphilic and non-Paraphilic sexual behaviour.
It is a Maladaptive pattern of sexual behaviour leading to clinically significant impairment or distress, as manifested by three or more number of key markers over a 12 month period.
Various sex Addiction tests/screening checklists are available online.
We know that brain development is a significant contributor. Mood altering sensations are enjoyable.
Neurochemical changes – which the brain likes- helps to cope with the stresses and issues in life.
The brain will develope use dependency. Repeated acting out of desire becomes a must. Corrective action is needed at various and different levels to give back conscious and unconscious control of behaviour choices.
Addicts will risk paying a high price for the pleasures that come from acting out
The real pleasure is not so much the orgasm, but the chase for the ultimate experience.
Sex therapy intervention helps you to learn that you can survive without the constant sexual acting out.
..but don’t forget the partners who are affected and need help with the issues too
Gary is a member of the Association for the treatment of sexual addiction & compulsivity. Face to face treatment in Bristol or by Skype.
Listen to these discussions by Gary about sex addiction
“Bringing colour back to life”